It Is Time to Enact the “Critically Endangered Father’s Act!”

June 12, 2014 |

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Extinctions have occurred throughout our planets natural history. Some species develop as others die out, making space in the ecosystem for those best suited to any given habitats natural conditions.The United States Congress enacted the Endangered Species Act of 1973, created to protect not only plant and animal species, but their ecosystems as well. A Critically Endangered (EN) species is one which has been categorized as likely to become extinct. Many factors contribute to that endangered status including; numbers remaining, the overall increase or decrease in the population over time, breeding success rates, and known threats, classified as “Invasive Species.”

Alarmingly, there is a new environmental invasive species that has become a real known threat to the male Homosapien population of the United States of America. It is a particularly meddlesome species that patriots have dubbed the “Liberal Ideologue Environmental Lice Infestation Pandemic” (LIELIP) more popularly known as “Lying Lips Lice.” This non-indigenous, foreign bred, parasitic form of lice seems to have originated at the White House and quickly spread to a little-known rather swampy division of the Department of Justice. More on that later.

Lying Lips Lice despise the traditional American habitat and can be found to be especially virulent in the businesses and homes of hard working, God loving Americans. Oddly, this strain of lying lice is most harmful to the conservative male Homosapien and does not seem to affect the queer or even the ‘Metrosexual’ male who has recently morphed into the ‘Spornosexual’ category, an extremely narcissistic version of the male species. Biologists feel that selfie-obsessed ‘Spornosexuals,’ do not make good hosts for this particular lice because ‘Spornosexuals,’ spend so much time naked in the bathroom looking at themselves, that it clearly demonstrates they have adapted extremely well to the sick, obsessive, self-worshipping Obama Lying Lips Lice environment. Alarmingly, the male species most targeted by this Lying Lips Lice infestation is the American father! For almost six years, Lying Lips Lice have tried to infect the minds of men throughout America, and if not stopped soon, fatherhood could possibly become an endangered species!

It has been proven that Lying Lips Lice is especially intent on infesting conservative fathers because they are excellent role models for America’s moral Judeo-Christian environment, and Lying Lips Lice cannot fester in a morally truthful environment! In fact, all conservative men pose a major threat and nuisance to the King Crab of Lying Lips Lice, Barack Hussein Obama, for they get in the way of his ultimate goal; a NWO and an androgynous 1984-like society. Feisty faithful fathers are especially difficult to infect because they refuse to be “neutered” by King Crab Lying Lips Lice Obama and his police state tactics and will do anything to protect the well-being of their families. This resistant force of ‘real men’ who refuse to tolerate the Lying Lips disease will eventually die out and become extinct if the Lying Lips  Lice are allowed to continue to thrive.

What spurned this outbreak of Lying Lips Lice in the first place and why did the King Crab of Lying Lips Lice, Barack Hussein Obama quickly pass it on to the offices of Eric Holders DOJ? Could it be that the DOJ and its little known department, the “Environmental & Natural Resources Division“or ENRD is one of the biggest lies that has been allowed to fester in the middle of Obama’s environmental Pinocchio pandemonium? The ENRD, well known for it’s Gibson guitar raid…is the White House mobster wing of extortion that funds “some of the nation’s largest environmental organizations, as well as the smallest,” according to its own website! Huge extortion settlements are made through teams of non-negotiating Gestapo- like attorneys who are nothing more than shysters being paid to steal and perpetuate a seemingly endless string of bogus environmental scams that are legally way beyond the DOJ’s statutory authority!

Not surprisingly, Obama’s groupie gorilla-like feminists hail this Lying Lips Lice disease as a great “ill” for their cause as well. Brown shirts that fit both female and males can be mass produced and pants that only have a side zipper, are much more politically correct for their cross- gender bathrooms. These same feminists are also pleased that an entirely new strain of Lying Lips Lice has recently been discovered in their damp feminist hairy armpits…. liberal pits of breeding comfort where the lice quickly multiply but do not affect their feminist host! This new strain called “The Feminist Armpits of Lying Lips Lice” will help their global cause of depopulation because there is not a ‘real man’ on the face of the earth who would want to procreate with them, or go anywhere near them for that matter.

So, just how can all decent American’s help avoid this perilous extinction of the father species? The first step is to visit your local golf courses, fine dining restaurants and lavish resorts. There, you will find your local Congressmen and you will be able to petition them to enact the “Critically Endangered Father’s Act!” But, can we ultimately rely on them to get this important job done? No, not if we examine our representatives treasonous voting records!

Luckily, conservative researchers have found that there is a far simpler and much more reliable way to stamp out this dreaded Lying Lips Lice infestation.  Recently, it has been discovered that the Bikini waxing of the female Homosapien has almost killed off the infestation of Crab Lice disease and the depilation of body hair seems to be the reason for the cure. Therefore, It has become obvious that the “root” cause of the invasive Lying Lips Lice infestation must be depilated, starting with the nation’s King Crab of Lying Lips Lice, Barack Hussein Obama. The thinking is that once King Obama is gone, the next important step would be to “pick away” at the hundreds of grossly negligent departments crammed full of Lying Lips Lice infested public servants who have served under the King Crab of Lying Lips command.

If your Congressman or Senator cannot be reached because they happen to be on one of those tax paid vacation overseas, in the name of “foreign diplomacy,” wink, wink, then just call this toll free number (1-800- screw D.C.) and tell the answering machine you have had it with their ‘Lying Lip’ answering service and that something must be done to eradicate this terrible Lying Lips pandemic on Capitol Hill! It would be the best Father’s Day gift ever! Happy Father’s Day to all!

 

 

 

 

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About the Author ()

Author of children's classics; Cynthiajquinn.com

Comments (3)

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  1. Diana says:

    Love you kid. I love how you don’t sugar coat anything. Of course I know it’s because we don’t have time it’s getting shorter and shorter. Great post and will send it out to my mailing list.

  2. Rose says:

    Cyn, what a hilarious, clever article….I must say, it gave me a modicum of relief from the daily Lying Lips Lice administration and those who support it. A good laugh at them is a relief one needs from day to day, trying our best to eradicate this disease from the face of the earth….or at least from America. I am wondering whether it was Soros who brought this dreaded plague to America and infected the left’s ability to reason with common sense.

    Happy Father’s Day to those of you who haven’t been infected. Women everywhere applaud you for your healthy immune system!

  3. Leticia says:

    Don’t forget the feminists who are infested with Lying Lips Lice…they go to the sperm bank to get weak sperm to procreate “because there is not a ‘real man’ on the face of the earth who would want to procreate with them, or go anywhere near them for that matter”.